Since 2019 I’ve selected a word of the year to guide my decisions and help me reach my goals. I like to express the mood of each theme through a design that correlates with my interpretation of the word. Each years word is informed by the previous years. Looking back at all these words bring back a flood of memories including the events of each year but most of all each word reveals the headspace I was in and what I prioritized over everything else. Before I get to 2022, I wanted to take a walk down memory lane and review my words of the year from the very beginning.
In 2019 I was 50% through college, 2 internships down, and was finally confident enough to to standing on my own two feet. I started to get more intentional (hence starting this whole “word of the year journey). It was the year where I finally got over the “I hate everything and I can’t do this” mentality and shifted to an “I want to make change and move mountains” mind set. I learned so much about my strengths and how to use them in school, the community, and my every day life. I felt like I dug myself out of a hole this year and I wanted to keep up this energy. The determination and intensity I put into this word come through in the colors and simplicity of the design as well. I emerged from a pretty dark and bleak place, so the glimmer of hope 2019 brought was a shining light. A body in motion stays in motion, and I was quite literally on a roll.
The irony of choosing the word “Progress” right before a global pandemic doesn’t illude me, but I made some major decisions before March of 2020 that set me up to live up to this years theme. I took the foundation of “Momentum” and transformed it into moving forward and beyond what I already knew. I went out on a limb and started and internship with Amazon. I joined a number of clubs and associations that I found to be meaningful. Most importantly I decided to move out for a few months and spend a significant amount of time alone. I cooked, I painted, I read, I probably consumed more media than ever before. The pale blue and flowers symbolize how cool and calm I was about making these decisions for myself. I was able to let go of many of my greatest worries and move on to better things. Cheers to great shifts in perspective and great strides.
Ah yes, 2021, the year I entered the workforce and moved across the United State to a city where I knew absolutely no one. I devoted 2021 to becoming an absolute work horse; I probably worked more hours than not. When I chose this word I knew it was to prove something to myself and everyone around me. 2021 was all about learning as much as humanly possible and being helpful to everyone around me. This years design was inspired by standing out in my own way in a rigid environment; I wanted to paint corporate America in my own colors. I knew this year would make me see things from a different perspective and would force me to live outside of the box. To be completely honest, I didn’t even know what I was chasing; I just wanted to rise to the occasion. All this hard work culminated in getting a promotion in early 2022, so I guess you could say it was worth it, but this forced me make some sacrifices. I didn’t have friends or hobbies. I was terrified of living in Seattle alone. I woke up before the sun and got to the office earlier than most people woke up. I didn’t leave until the sun was down. I was exhausted and anxious all the time. Everyone I worked with warned me about burn out and I was obviously aware of the risks, but I wanted to finish 1 full year being as ambitious as possible. I used 2019s “momentum” and 2020s “progress” as spring boards into “ambition.” 2021 symbolized the first year that resulted in me choosing a word for the following year that was in many ways contradictory to the previous years focus. I had to course correct. That’s what led me to my 2022s theme: Balance.
In 2022 my main focus was to make friends, have fun, and get comfortable. To be honest, the first 5 months of 2022 were a complete failure in terms of balance because I couldn’t shake my ambitious tendencies, but my birthday was a big turning point for me. I spent it alone and without any direction. I began to feel the effects of burn out in full force. I finally took personal time seriously. I needed to do something to intentionally make myself feel steady, neutral, and grounded. If 2021 was about thinking outside of the box, 2022 was about putting myself in a box; some place that was safe and had boundaries. Over time I learned to love Seattle and all that comes with it. I found great solace in finding a community and friends. Most of all I found great comfort in myself. I am so proud of how at ease I’ve become in my own presence. The greatest lesson I learned from this word was that balance is a live long mantra that never leaves you. I’ll never perfect it but I will continue to strive for it every single day.
While I achieved a number of personal goals in 2022, I can’t say I fulfilled all my intentions for this years theme. This exercise wouldn’t be meaningful if I gave myself a pat on the back and called it a day, so I’m going to take this opportunity to be vocally self critical and write about what I still have to work on in 2023.
- I wanted “balance” to include health and wellness as well, but unfortunately it just didn’t happen. I think I may have gone a little too “Eat, Pray, Love,” this year – extra emphasis on the eat – but I also achieved my goal of getting to yelp elite status this year, so you win some you lose some. In 2022 I wanted to figure out the optimal diet for my own body and establish a regular exercise routine. I’ve always feared getting a completely preventable disease, which is honestly the last way I want to leave this world. I took a class in late 2022 that gave me hope in regards to eating to complement my hormone cycle and it was inspiring. I’m still scared of failing for yet another year on this one, but I’m excited to rise to the occasion be focus my 2023 theme around this goal.
- My intention with balance was to achieve some level of equilibrium between work and life, but there were some weeks where I may have over corrected and neglected the work part of my life. I was so hard on myself for that. Again, I recognize that balance is a life long goal for most people, and it only gets harder the older you get. I want to stop feeling guilty for not getting it right all the time. I think I still have a ways to go on this one.
- Long distance friends and family are not my strong suit. Relationships are a huge part of a balanced social life, and I honestly don’t call or text people enough. 2022 was very much about myself. I also have come to realize that I associate having more people in your life means actively carrying the burden of all those people as well, but I don’t think that had to be the case. Boundaries *say it louder for the people in the back* and a few potentially uncomfortable conversations will likely address these concerns.
With that, I’m excited to close the chapter on 2022 and move on to 2023s theme: Discomfort. Growing pains are a natural part of life and I want to use 2023 as a period to face my fears and go placed I’ve never gone before. Cheers to growing pains.